Thrashing around

OK, I'm still feeling itchy and restless about not having a somewhat bigger,ongoing project in the works. I spent large portions of yesterday mentallythrashing around trying to figure out what to work on. And of course, with all that thrashing, I really didn't end up working on much of anything. I think I did get a bit closer to the root of the problem however. It's not so much the size as the ongoing part that I'm looking for. The quick little things I've been playing with take a certain type of energy. And there are frequently days, like yesterday when I spent several morning hours on my knees digging crabgrass out of my new flowerbed, when I just don't have that certain type of energy. I would have loved to pick up some handwork that I could just stitch on and not have to think about yesterday afternoon. Except there wasn't any.

So I puttered around and did a lot of blog reading. Sonji is my hero right now. She made a quilt a day last week. But here's the part that really got me: in recapping her very productive week, she said she learned that even when she feels overwhelmed and empty she can still make something nice. Overwhelmed and empty. Yep, that's it in a nutshell. I've got so many books and ideas and techniques, not to mention all the real life stuff...I'm overwhelmed and I can't concentrate on any of it.

Two more words jumped out at me from the latest issue of Artist's Sketchbook this morning on the bus: procrastination and perfectionism. Yep, that too. None of my ideas are "perfect" enough, so I don't do anything. When instead, I should learn from Sonji's Excellent Week of Quilting: do lots of stuff and some of it will most likely turn out cool. Or in Sonji's case, all of it will make me drool with envy. ;-)

Today I spent my lunch hour reworking my original idea for the Straight and Narrow Challenge. My initial BIG sketch just wasn't working, so I scaled the whole thing down to something I liked better. This piece is mostly handwork so maybe it will satisfy the "ongoing project" need. (Hmm, is it that the ongoing project keeps me grounded and better able to deal with the overwhelming amounts of other stuff?) When I have that certain type of energy, I can keep playing with my little technique experiments. Or something. Any words of wisdom will be greatly appreciated...

Now I have to take the cat out. He's a house cat and only goes outside under strict supervision. But he just spent a glorious weekend hopping around eating the grass while I dug up the freaking crabgrass and now he's positively howling to get out after being inside all day.